FINALLY

today is finally the day...the day that i cant take it anymore and finally cried!!!had been acting strong and happy, trying damn hard to juggle projects on one hand and another trying damn hard not to jeopardize the friendship.....it is so freaking hard to please everyone!!!is damn hard to co-ordinate everything....to get everyone to meet and all.....have to accept all kind of excuses and rubbish...really testing my patience.....did i say i enjoy the stress and all...yeah i did!!!but i guess there is a limit....juz like a rubber band....can stretch and all...juz has a limit to everything.. a limit when it will eventually break....i m broken!!!haha...what a joke?funny not funny?i lost my sense of humour....damn....haha...whatever!!!i m juz mad!

seriously, i really feel damn helpless....trying damn hard to perfect the whole project, then pple dwn there cant stand me!!!saying i m insensitive, expecting too much from them, harsh on them, doing everything by myself!!!like hello!!!!i wont want to do everything myself if u guys wake up ur ideas!!!!at times when i try to loosen up n crack some jokes...thx so much of a joke lah coz i juz got scolded for being dumb and not using my brains and trying damn hard to irritate them...ehz tell me what m i suppose to do lah....trying to let go!!!trying to be nice....backfired!how cool ya?seriously teach me what to do lah....play ard or be serious....super duper confused now can???really draining all my energy....my concentration level and work performance is really below what i expect from myself....i can see fr the kind of result i produce....didn read instructions, end up doing the wrong stuff, wasting time and brain cells.....then again...no excuses lah...lousy means lousy....what concentration level drop and all...tt's crap!!!just an excuse for being lazy?excuse for being stupid?excuse for being....no idea....add on to my list man!!!

i decided to give up!!!!!do my part tt's all.....i shall not be the one who initiate the whole thing, just sit dwn there and talk appropriately and sit back waiting for instructions...i cant be bothered! just tell me what to do...enough is enough!!!i really had enough!!!!whatever fuck! felt so much better!!!!not because i bitch on my blog!!!but because i really cried the shit out of me!!! crazy!!!crazy!!!crazy!!!eyes tired!!!shall go to bed now!!!!crazy crazy crazy!!!!tt's it!!!!!